Losing someone you truly love is hard. Knowing full well that you’re never going to feel their presence again. Knowing that they’re gone forever.
Pet loss is undeniable the worst feeling someone can feel. Losing your pet and blaming yourself for it is difficult to manage.
Today, I lost my beloved cat. My shadow.
I regret not spending time with him more. I regret not being there when he’s fighting for his life. I regret not hugging him more.
I’m never going to smell his tuna breath again. I’m never going to see his beautiful eyes begging for food. I’m never going to feel his fur. I’m never going to wake up with him beside me. I’m never going to see him bask in the sun.
He’s now a memory. I’m afraid I’ll forget his whole existence. I’m afraid his name would just be someone I used to love. I’m afraid his face will be fading soon.
I’ve lost 6 pets in my lifetime. I don’t know what I did to deserve this feeling. Not a day goes by that I didn’t blame myself for their death. Not a day goes by that I didn’t live full of guilt and shame.
I can’t come home knowing you’re not there anymore. The house feels so empty.
What should I do? How can I move on? How can I live?
-A.L ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚
